It’s summer time and it means I’m doing one of two things:

  1. Chilling at home with real food, spending time with my family and girlfriend (editor’s note: sick brag, bro)
  2. Working at the Lowe’s down the street from my house

In my 3-4 weeks of working at Lowe’s so far, I have met a handful of characters. People who have bought stuff that looks like they wanna cook meth, kids from my high school who are buying piping because they are mechanics, plumbers, etc. But the greatest people that I have met are the sports fans. I have worked cutting lumber, working at the registers, or just helping people find stuff. In the 5-15 minutes I have spent with people, I have met my share of the best sports guys to the absolute worst. So while I’m currently on my lunch break typing this on my phone, I am gonna list a handful of the people I have met:

1. A “Bama” Fan…wearing a Texas Hat

Now this guy was one of the most chill and cool guys I have spoken to while at Lowe’s. He ordered a Fridge and other stuff and while we were waiting for it to be brought to the front, we talked and I brought up his UT Hat (Note: I Dislike UT). Right after I brought it up, he told me that he only wore the hate because it was “Hideous” and didn’t mind if the hat got all sweaty or dirty. Then, seconds later he pulls out his wallet and it’s a Bama wallet with a Bama debit card and was just screaming Roll Tide in his pocket.

2. My coworker who thought the Heisman…was a position

So, at Lowe’s you have 3 types of people who work there:

  1. Summer Job Kids (College or High School kids who don’t care about Lowe’s at all a.k.a Me)
  2. The “Retired” (Got too bored sitting at home or ex-Military a.k.a My Favorite People)
  3. The Drake’s (Started From The Bottom Now We’re Here a.k.a NERDS)

One slow day, I was talking to my coworker. Let’s call her Jamie (I don’t wanna use her real name). I got an alert on my phone about Baker Mayfield on the Colin Cowherd show from Twitter (Read about it here). She asked who Baker was an I said “He was the #1 overall pick from the NFL. He played at Oklahoma University and won the Heisman”.

Image result for baker mayfield heisman

Now, before you jump for Jamie’s throat, she is in her Mid 50’s-Early 60’s, so she’s not into sport’s or twitter or anything. But she has the audacity to look me dead into my eyes and say “Why would he win a position, isn’t that what he played?”

Jamie. Jamie. Jamie. Football twitter would have ripped you a new one.

3. World Cup Fanatics

It’s June 2018, which means the world’s most useless sport is on and everybody and their mother is watching it. I only love soccer when Team USA is playing because I am a true Patriot.

But we suck at Futbol so we aren’t in it. This hasn’t stopped people from tuning in to watch. It’s taken over our break room at work because everytime I go in for a break or lunch, 3-7 people will be huddled around a phone and it makes it look like Drew Brees is calling a play on the field:

Image result for drew brees kneel

It has even got people shopping & walking around with their phones set up in their carts as a Portable TV to watch Iceland play Canada in soccer because when I think of those two teams, I think of Perennial Soccer Powerhouses.

I still have another ~2 months left working at Lowe’s and with Football Season kicking up, I’m sure I will meet more characters when the time comes.


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