In honor of the NBA trade deadline today, we decided to take a look at what some hypothetical trades would look like if trades existed in college basketball. Here are a few of our favorites.
Kansas sends Mitch Lightfoot, Tyler Self and a game-worn toupee from Bill Self to Central Florida for 7’6″ center Tacko Fall.
This makes sense for both sides. The Jayhawks add some much needed frontcourt depth and UCF gets a 5-time Big 12 champion in Tyler Self.
North Carolina trades Seventh Woods to Yale for the 2018 rights to Makai Mason and a 4-star tutor to teach UNC players how to read.
UNC has endured its fair share of criticism over creating fake classes for their basketball team to take. This trade will be a huge boost to the Tarheels’ team GPA and their back court. Yale gets a walking SportsCenter top-10 highlight in Seventh Woods.
Indiana sends Tom Crean, Thomas Bryant and a signed copy of “The Power of Negative Thinking” to UCLA in exchange for Steve Alford and the future rights to LaMelo Ball.
Indiana’s favorite son returns home and UCLA gets someone who might actually bother to play defense or rebound. UCLA also wins by not having to listen to Lavar Ball make more ridiculous claims about how his 18 year old son is better than Steph Curry.
Baylor sends Al Freeman, a $500 donation to the V Foundation and five tickets to Kim Mulkey’s Hall of Fame induction ceremony to North Carolina State for Dennis Smith Jr. and five extra timeouts for Scott Drew.
This is essentially just Mark Gottfried flipping NC State the bird on his way out the door. This gives Dennis Smith a chance to play in the NCAA Tournament before he cashes in and declares for the draft. Al Freeman also gets to return home to North Carolina which is great for him and every single Baylor fan.
Duke sends a new defibrillator for Bob Huggins to West Virginia in exchange for a coupon for a free manners and etiquette class for Grayson Allen taught by the logo himself, Jerry West.
Duke is world-renowned for two things: basketball and medicine. This trade gives them the opportunity to showcase both.
Arizona trades a round of golf at the Tuscon Country Club to Wisconsin and receives 10 clean white shirts for Sean Miller.
Pretty straight forward here. Greg Gard needs to escape the cold, Sean Miller needs to mask his perspiration.
The Big 12 Conference trades referees Ray Natali and Mike Stuart to the Lawrence YMCA in exchange for three new basketball nets and an air-pump.
And Bill Self wept.