PJ Guippone

During the second quarter of the Franklin American Mortgage Music City Bowl, Kentucky running back Benny Snell was tackled, an event that often happens in a football game. After the hit, the referee, whose name I do not value highly enough to look up, attempted to help up the fallen RB. This is also an event that occurs often in a football game. In response, Snell, who was stopped short on the run, appeared to brush the hand away and probably said something about how he does not need help. Again, something that occurs a nonzero amount in every football game.

In response, the referee, whose name I still do not care enough to take the time to research, threw a flag for unsportsmanlike conduct and EJECTED SNELL FROM THE GAME. This leads me to believe that if this referee was put in charge of our nation, his twitter account and press conferences would almost exactly mirror the current President’s tone of voice. It got me thinking, what is thicker than this ref’s skin.

Here are a few things:

  • The combined thickness of all Tennessee fans’ skins when they hear John Currie might hire Greg Schiano
  • A snake’s skin post shedding
  • Gary Patterson’s hair
  • Scalloped Potatoes
  • Louisville’s defense in the rivalry basketball game today against Kentucky
  • The tip of a pencil (.016 inches)
  • The combined thickness of all of Kevin Durant’s burner Twitter accounts’ skins.
  • Quagmire’s robe
  • The walls in your college house that allow you to hear every noise coming from your friend’s room, including the ones you certainly do not want to hear.
  • The first pre pubescent beard you grow

Point is, dude is soft.