I’m working on a theory that sounds a bit outlandish, but hear me out: Andy Williams’ “It’s The Most Wonderful Time of The Year” is about March. Some might believe it’s about Christmas, but think about the scary ghost stories and tales of the glories of tourneys from long, long ago. March is Christmas for anybody with stakes on games, brackets or an alma mater in the race. As with any holiday, we experience traditions as a whole, like Grandma stuffing the turkey, caroling in the neighborhood, and UConn as a #5 seed.

Connecticut rolls into a 5/12 matchup against a decent New Mexico State program that finished 26-6 with a WAC Championship. UConn’s Big East postseason bid ended at the hands of a superior Villanova quad in the conference semifinals. However, an impressive 23-9 record with wins against Auburn, Marquette and Villanova during the regular season kept the Huskies relevant. Look: UConn should win this game by at least fifteen, but the guard duel between Teddy Allen and RJ Cole is what March is all about.

That’s not why I’m here…

I think it’s time we acknowledge the amount of dynamite teams in the tourney that STINK at football. It’s ridiculous. So many HORRENDOUS programs with hoops popping off this March, on full display (as long as you have TruTV). Connecticut and New Mexico are prime example of this lopsided ordeal.

Both schools are in conferences for all other major sports (New Mexico State in the WAC and UConn in the Big East) except for football. Both independent programs combined for an abysmal record of 3-21 in 2021. I can’t really speak to the success of New Mexico State in the past few seasons other than the fact that they’ve gone 4-20 in the past 2 seasons, but I can go all day on UConn.

UConn’s last winning season came in 2010 when they got dogged in the Fiesta Bowl by Oklahoma and have never even come close to reaching that pinnacle again. Just disappointing.

Laughing Looking at the field…

But it’s hardly just Connecticut and New Mexico State; look at the top eight teams in the tournament. In the West, Gonzaga doesn’t even have a football program, and the Duke Blue Devils, the bluest of blue bloods, haven’t finished above even in football since 2018. In 2021, the team finished 3-9.

Meanwhile in the East, Kentucky and Baylor stray from the model, but since 2010, Kentucky’s football team has gone 72-77 while its hoops team has a title, played in two, and won the SEC six times. Baylor is in the same boat.

Out of the South region, Arizona and Villanova have endured its fair share of football troubles. Since 2010, Arizona has a record of 64-75 while the basketball team has won the Pac-12 four times and made the Elite Eight three times. Villanova’s D1-AA football squad has been better, but when comparing to the basketball team, it doesn’t hold a candle. Villanova football boasts a decent 82-56 record, but when you consider that since 2010, Jay Wright and the Wildcats possess five Big East championships, eight tournament appearances and two national titles, it’s incomparable.

The Weakest Show on Turf

In the Midwest, it gets worse when you think of Kansas. The Rock Chalk, Jayhawk football team is 23-118 since 2010. It makes you want to vomit just thinking about it. And now when you compare it to what they do on the hardwood, it’s even worse. Since 2010, they’ve won the Big 12 Tournament six times, made five Final Fours, and appeared in one National Championship game.

There’s no great explanation as to why these programs succeed often in basketball, but perpetually flop on the gridiron. The easy answer is being really good at one thing is probably better financially for a university’s athletics department than being okay at two. But football is king. It’s the cash cow of collegiate sports. Sure, basketball makes a lot of money in Lawrence, Kansas, but there’s also a reason that a Jayhawks win against Texas sends the campus into a state of mayhem. As a football guy, I absolutely hate to see that, but there is something so incredibly comedic about Kansas just being piss-poor at football.

Baker Mayfield was right; go cheer on basketball.